Draft Poem

Rana Yassa
April 24th, 2017

Born to Be Shamed 

“It’s a girl”

I grew up being described as ‘Beautiful’, ‘cute’

I was told that one day I would make a beautiful bride.

I grew up to be programmed in a certain culture.

To dress a certain way; not too short, not too revealing and not too sexy

To talk a certain way; not too loud, not too demanding, and be obedient

To walk a certain way,

I was told to live a specific, decent and the right way in the eyes of my culture.

I was told to never sit with my legs wide open, while my brother was never told the same thing.

I grew up to be limited and controlled while my brother grew up gaining more Freedom.

Was it something I did?

Did I not deserve as much freedom?

I grew up to believe that the world is too scary, and that I can’t trust myself out there.

I grew up to believe that I am too weak, too fragile, and too irresponsible to handle my own life.

I grew up to learn that I would always need a man in my life.

I grew up loving my brother,

Loving his life,

Loving how my parents always looked up to him.

I loved him so much that I wanted to be like him in everything.

But I also grew up to be rebellious,

To ask questions

Questions that always had one answer.

‘You are a girl’

I started to hate being a girl,

Holding up everyday the burden of being a girl.

A backpack that had all the negative words I heard,

About my body

My hair

My makeup

My dresses

And so on.

Holding the feeling of being less worthy,

Less righteous

And less accepted.

I grew up being told to never show so much of my body,

While seeing my brother taking his shirt off whenever he pleases.

It never made sense to me; was something wrong with my body?

I grew up to learn that my friends,

Neighbors,

And society

Will always do one thing; sexualize my body.

I grew up seeing the media all around me praising naked women,

Praising a model type of body

Praising blonde Hair

And Loving colored eyes.

Later in High School;

I learned that the only way to attract attention is by sexualizing myself.

I grew up to see girls throwing their bodies on guys and being called

‘cool’

‘sexy’

‘Fun’

I grew up wanting to be called ‘sexy’

I wanted to look ‘cool’

I grew up wanting to have a sexy body, and to fit in this society.

I also learned that education doesn’t matter as much for me as for my brother.

I grew up believing that if I am a nice looking girl that would be enough.

I grew up learning the worst.

I grew up knowing that the only way I will ever be seen is through my body.

I tried to fight back

Protest

Refuse to be like many other girls.

But I was told to give up,

To give up my dreams,

To give up the life I wanted to live.

I grew up to learn that everything is impossible for me.

But then I grew up to find other women fighting for me;

 Creating their own beauty, worth, and forcing the world not just to accept them the way they are but even recognizing that there is another way for women to live.

Baraba Kruger

Protesting, Fighting,

Proving that women can do much more that just;

Cook

Clean

 Get Pregnant

Cry

Instead claiming that women are;

Powerful

Successful

Smart

Intelligent

Creative

Loving

Supportive

Worthy

And above all can rock any kind of career.

As she quotes;

“Your body is a battleground”

Switching women from being a sexual object,

To a beautiful art project.

Reversing the eyes of society from women

To cultural norms,

To gender roles,

And to faulting the mind set that we all grew up to be.

Another women to look up to,

Yoko Ono

Giving a new perspective of women,

Brave

Respective

Demanding

Pointed on society as the one to be blamed.

Refused to believe her body is shameful,

Refused to sexualize her body,

A pair of scissors

And a full covered body is all what Ono used,

Criticizing the audience

Showing they are the ones who act

Who chose to cut,

And tear away her clothes?

Ono takes the weight off the women shoulders

And projects it onto society

Boosting my confidence as well as many others

I grew up refusing to fit in a society,

Instead I chose to construct my own society that fits my standards and beliefs.

I proved myself,

I am worthy

I am beautiful not because of my face and body,

Beautiful because of my mind and soul

I am sexy in every creative idea,

I am fun and cool to be around;

Because of my witty laugh and warm smile.

I am loved and accepted;

Because I chose to surround myself with people like me

People who love me for who I am

People who fuel me with positivity

People who help me achieve my dreams

I surrounded myself with people who chose to be there for me

Standing there

Pushing me further to reach the life I grew up to dream of.